When Fangirls Attack
by Rainbow The Fish-Pony
Summary: If a couple of weirdo crazy fans meet the PJO characters,what'll go down? Beach chases,abstinence speeches,and a whole lot of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.So what DOES happen when fangirls attack?A charming little story to tell the grandkids.
1. Chapter 1

**Hiya, everybody! Whoa, Mickey Mouse moment right there… Anyway, this is Rainbow The Fish Pony (Formerly known as Sha-bang Sha-boom)! And if you don't get my name, shame on you! You need an unhealthy dose of PJO, just like all the other people around here! Yep, I'm back, with a short story for you guys. A little background info for this story: it was originally a dream I had over the summer. I skipped some random parts in the dream (Like giant foods and house- don't ask) to fit it into a story. Plus, I woke up before I could finish it, so I just finished that too. It'll probably be 2, 3 chapters. It's nothing serious; just a fun, little story I had to write/type up. It's going to make fun of lots of pairings, which is funny, because I support like half of them, and OOC-ness. I guess it could count as a Percabeth Revolution, but not really. And side note: in case you don't get the record scratch thing, you know in shows how everything is going la deed ah, until something goes wrong and you hear that record scratch? Yeah. So, without further ado, I bring you the story! [Warning: May contain stereotypes of fangirls, crazy people, and overuse of exclamation points]**

***DISCLAIMER*:**** Unless I have a plan to kidnap Rick Riordan and his family, tip the police off, and force him to give me the rights by taking away his cookie privileges and threatening him with a pickle gun, I don't own PJO. Pfftf…what plan? I don't have a plan…*throws paper with plan away***

**When Fangirls (and boys) Attack- by RainbowTheFishPony**

*****Cue peaceful music* It was a calm, summer day at Camp Half-Blood. Well, as calm as you can get with demigods. The Stymphalian birds were screeching, the sun chariot was burning up some poor town (Apollo was taking student drivers again), and half-bloods doing what they do best– trying not to die. Hark! Over there by Half-Blood Hill! Percy Jackson and the gang running for their lives by vicious, horrifying … mortals? With pens and laptops? Something is definitely not right. Let's back track a few hours, shall we?

(2 HOURS BEFORE)

"_I made an oath, Nico." Thalia said as their faces inched closer and closer. The moonlight at the beach made her electric blue eyes even brighter._

"_Break it." Nico whispered. They've been through so much to let one oath break them apart. Their lips were about to-_

*RECORD SCRATCH*

"AH! What the Hades is happening?" Thalia screamed, jumping back, leaving Nico to fall on his face.

"Thanks a lot." Grumbled Nico, spitting sand everywhere. "What were we doing?"

"I have no idea! I was just overcome with this feeling and-" Thalia stopped when a figure darted from the tree it was hiding before. She motioned for Nico to come and follow the mysterious stranger.

"Who is th-"

"Shh!" She cut him off. "We're about to find out." With that, she pounced on the stranger and took out her hunting knives. "I got you now you…huh?"

In the glow of the celestial knives, was a mortal girl, armed with a laptop and a crazy grin plastered on her face.

"Who in the name of Zeus are you? And why were you watching us?" Nico demanded as Thalia got off of her.

"Oh em gee! It's Nico! I totally love you!" squealed the girl.

"Uh…thanks?" Nico's expression changed from anger to confusion.

"And I loved that part in the Battle of the Labryinth, page 287, paragraph 4 when you told off Minos!" And she kept babbling on and on about parts where she thought Nico was "fantabulous."

"I think she's a huge bag of wackydoodles." Nico whispered to Thalia while making the crazy signal.

"Aww!" the human stopped talking to acknowledge their exchange. "Are you guys talking about your love to each other? You guys are so cute! That's why I made that kiss scene about you."

"WHAT? You caused that?" Thalia was seething.

"Duh! I'm a writer!"

"I don't like Nico! I'm a Huntress! I may not like pink and girly stuff, but I'm not emo. Plus, he's like, what, ten?"

"Hey!" Nico protested. "I'm not emo!Why does everybody always assume that? And I'm thirteen! Furthermore, why would I ever like Thalia? She's so temperamental, and bossy and-"

"And what, Nico?" Thalia drew her hunting knives once again.

"And totally out of my league?" Nico tried to make a weak save. But, of course, he failed.

So the mortal author cackled and typed away as Nico screamed for help while Thalia chased him mercilessly around the beach.

**Okay, I lied. I only planned to make this scene a couple of sentences long. But it turned into this whole long thing. I guess I'll do each pairing a chapter long. Soo? How'd you like it? I'm so tired of those first lines in the italics. They're so overused. I actually like this pairing, but still. Next chapter coming up hopefully soon. It'll be on Percabeth. I have an idea in mind already, but no promises! Words of encouragements, constructive criticism, and suggestions are greatly appreciated! **


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm so proud of myself. It's been less than a week and another "chapter" coming at you! The quote on chapters because like I said before, all these pairings were originally supposed to be one chapter. So I guess the shortness helps with the fast updates, but let me have my moment of proudness… Okay, done. This chapter is part of the reason why this story is rated T, so if you're one of those 10-yr-old mini readers, turn away and do your homework! (which is what I'm not doing right now.) You have been warned. Don't sue me for any emotional damage, explosive diarrhea, etc etc. So, here's everyone's favorite couple, Percabeth!**

**DISCLAIMER: Too lazy for a fancy one. Do not own Percy Jackson, blah blah blah.**

_"C'mon Annabeth!" Percy said as he held her hand. "You're doing great!"_

_"Push!" The nurse said._

_"I'm never going through this again, Seaweed Brain!" Annabeth screamed as she did as the nurse said._

_Few minutes later, they were through. In Annabeth's arms was a baby boy, with green and gray eyes. _

"_I can't believe he's ours. I can't believe we're teenage parents." Murmured Annabeth._

"_I love you, Wise Girl."_

"_I love you, too, Seaweed Brain."_

*RECORD SCRATCH*

"I was pregnant?" Annabeth looked back and forth between the little boy in her arms and Percy.

"We never did anything!" A very flustered Percy stood shocked. "We're only sixteen!"

"So? You guys are in love!" A new voice came from behind a piece of machinery.

Out came yet another author, this time with a pencil scribbling on at a notepad.

"Uh… hi?" Poor confused, now father, Percy looked ready to jump out of the window and forget this whole thing. "Do we know you?"

"You should." The girl sniffed. "I'm, like, you're number one fan! I know everything! Like, right now, you're wearing green boxers with mini jellyfish on them."

He checked. "That's creepy. What are you doing here? I thought these were kind of private."

"I wanted to see how my scene played out, duh!" The writer girl said, like it was obvious. "It's very hard to capture it right, since I keep getting kicked out when I try to take notes on other people."

During this whole creepy fangirl exchange, Annabeth was unusually silent. But now, her face was turning purple from anger. "You! How the heck are you controlling us? I went through all that pain and suffering! I swear to the gods, I will hunt you down once I-"

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Annabeth." The girl said with a creepy smile that would make people run in circles screaming, "HELP! STRANGER DANGER IN ROOM 23!" which is exactly what Percy did. "Because you're have a visitor in about 10 seconds."

"What are you talking ab-oh, Styx." Annabeth started cursing in Greek.

Percy turned pale and started sweating like a mad man, realizing who they were talking about. "You didn't. You can't! Please, I'm begging you!"

_Poof!_ It was too late. She was here. "Why hello, Annabeth. And _Percy._" She said his name through gritted teeth.

Annabeth sighed, giving up on any lies she thought of.

"Hi, Mom."

The goddess cocked her head toward the writer. "Who's your friend?"

"Oh, she's definitely no friend of ours." Annabeth narrowed her eyes, and turned back to Athena. "Look, I know what you're going to yell and turn Percy into a rat and-"

"I'm not going to yell, or do anything irrational." Athena said calmly.

Percy sighed in relief. The goddess looked in his direction, seeming to remember he was there.

"Who am I kidding, I'm going to yell.' She said, turning to her whole 10-feet-self as everyone held their ears."…"

This went on for about 20 minutes, then Athena took a caught her breath and smiled at a tired Annabeth, scarred-for-eternity Percy, and a sleeping fangirl(She got bored after 5 minutes). "Now, I made a speech for you two."

"You mean that wasn't it?" Percy braced for impact.

"Don't worry, I kept it short." He (very unwisely, he should really know better by now.) breathed out again. Athena pulled out a very,very,very,very(three thousand very's later) long scroll"It's about abstinence."

And that's when the son of the sea god snapped. He jumped out the window, figuring that the broken bones he would get would be better than enduring hours of the wisdom goddess talk about premarital sex.

_Please, Father, let me not get hurt too bad. _Percy prayed to Poseidon. Too bad the sea god heard about the pregnancy and turned a deaf ear on Percy's request.

Everything turned black. Percy Jackson woke up in a hospital room, with his left arm and leg in casts. His vision was a little fuzzy, and his head throbbed. He looked around his room: a window, a bunch of machines, a get well teddy bear, and…Athena.

"Good, you're awake." The goddess smiled in happiness, Percy thought all was forgiven and smiled back. "Now I can continue my abstinence speech."

He groaned, lying back in defeat.

"Having sex before you're prepared is a huge mistake. Look what happened with Sally…"

**So kiddies, whad'ya think? Hee hee. ****I think I tortured Percy too much in this chappy….Nah. I know Athena is kinda OOC in here, maybe not. I imagine her as a protective mother, who can be a bit overbearing. Just a bit… Haha, next chapter in the works. Any ideas for pairings will be welcomed. Credit will be given if I didn't think of it already. I'll let Percy take it away with one of those PSA messages after Secret Life of the American Teenager.**

**Percy: *sarcastically* Gee, glad to be of service. Well, kids, I'll cut Athena's "short" speech even shorter. Abstinence= good. Jumping through windows=emergency room.**

**Athena:*pats Percy on head* Good boy.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Salutations! Hee hee, always wanted to say that…I apologize for taking forever to update, but school has been Hades. I have swim practice right after, and loads of homework (Thank you, math teacher), projects, quizzes, etc. Not to mention practicing my instruments…but that would make me seem like a brat for complaining, wouldn't it? I'll save it for my diary.(Not that I have one you should know about.) This was originally supposed to be a Chris/Clarisse one, but since I've never read any C/C fics, and don't intend too, I didn't feel inspired. So one day, I was drinking some soup, when I got the idea of making this a Katie/Travis. So…yeah. Before I sign off from yet another long author's note, I just wanted to put a little book review in. I recently read The Red Pyramid (kudos to Sarah who let me borrow it. Gracias, you little 12-yr-old! :D) I didn't think it would live up to PJO standards, but it was a very, very, great book. I can't compare it to PJO, or say which is better, since they're different, but Rick Riordan pwns. Again, 'Nuff said.**

**DISCLAIMER: ****If I was actually Rick Riordan, I would give Anubis a thousand more lines, since he reminds me of an older version of Nico. Death related, dark, dresses in black, sarcastic, loner, and insanely hot. They could be twins!**

"_Today's such a wonderful day, isn't it, Travis?" Katie said as the couple frolicked through the strawberry fields._

"_Almost as wonderful as you." Travis winked, grabbing her hand. _

_She giggled, and they lay down to bask in the sunshine. Katie played with Travis' beautiful curly brown locks, while Travis sighed contently. This was amazing. This was true happiness. This was-_

*RECORD SCRATCH*

"MADNESS!" A very loud Katie Gardner said, yanking herself up.

"Gee, thanks for ripping half my hair out, Katie." Travis Stoll rubbed his head. "Next time, you might wanna remove your fingers from my awesome hair before you act all crazy."

Katie smacked the side of his head. Travis yelled at her for hurting his head, again. Katie yelled at Travis to stop yelling at her. Travis yelled at her to stop yelling at him to stop-well, you get the point. The fighting continued, until a rustle came from behind a strawberry bush.

"Someone's there." Katie whispered, mid-slap.

"Noooo…" Travis rolled his eyes. "I thought it was a giant strawberry trying to do yoga." And he earned himself another smack.

"Hello? Who's there?" asked Katie while Travis rubbed his head and mumbled incoherent things.

No one answered, so the demigods cautiously walked toward the bush. The field was silent, when all of a sudden came a, "BOO!" behind them and one half-blood made a girly scream and jumped in the other's arms.

"Oof! Travis, get off of me!" Katie dropped the son of Hermes down on his ungodly butt.

Once everyone (meaning Travis) stopped rocking in a fetal position and gained their composure, they turned to face their alleged boo-er.

"Okay, I'm kind of in a rush to finish this chapter, so I'll make this quick." The stranger blurted before Katie or Travis could say a word. "I know what you're going to ask me." She did a poor imitation of Katie's voice. "'What in the name of *insert god here* are you doing here, how are you controlling us', blah blah blah. Who am I? I'm a writer. What am I doing here? This is a free country. How am I controlling you...Next question. Wondering why I know all your questions? Other writer friends' failed attempts + twitter,"

She paused to take a breath. Then she did that creepy smile that all fans seemed to have. "So let's finish that scene, shall we?"

"Hold up, hold up!" Katie put her hands up in a "stop" gesture. "First of all, I do _not_ sound like that."

"Actually, you do, Katie." Travis said.

"Stay out of this! Second of all, I still have more questions, and I better get answers. And finally, I will never, not in a million years, finish that 'scene', or whatever the heck that was!" Katie was practically steaming, the plants around her were swaying restlessly, as if they felt her anger.

"Ooh, touchy, touchy, are we?" The writer's eyes narrowed. "For that, I might just put something tragic about you in the next chap-" Just then, something beeped from the girl's pocket. "Oh, that's my pager. I gotta run. I got a flamer to scream at. **(Thumbs up for stereotypical flame/flamer relationship! Oh wait… this isn't Youtube..) **But don't worry, I'll be back." The girl did yet another horrible mimic of the Terminator and ran off.

There was an awkward silence between the two demigods. Travis cleared his throat multiple times, and Katie played with a small vine. After Travis' seventh throat clearing, his ADHD brain couldn't take the silence anymore.

"That was…" He struggled to find words to describe their encounter. "…different."

"Different? That's all you have to say?" Katie was still fuming from her argument. "Aren't you mad at all that someone's writing ridiculous stuff about us?"

"I seriously doubt she'll be writing anytime soon."

"Oh, yeah? Why not? Please enlighten me."

"Because I stole her computer." Travis flaunted the laptop from behind his back.

Katie cracked a smile, and pretty soon, they were both laughing for nothing in particular. The whole situation seemed pretty funny. Once they stopped laughing, they smiled at each other again.

"Even if today was totally weird, even by half-blood standards, I had fun." cheerily said Travis. They had a moment, until he said, "And it's okay if you have a crush on me and my 'beautiful curly brown locks'." Katie gave him a death glare that she always gave Travis and his brother after they messed with her.

"Ow, ow! Kidding, Katie, jeez!" Travis screamed as Katie Gardner pulled him by the ear back towards camp.

**And…scene. Honestly, I like the Travis/Katie pairing, though I always wondered why no one picks Connor. To me, it feels like Travis is older, but whatever. Actually, I've never read a bad Tratie fic. All the ones I've read are amazing, so why did I rag on it? For the heck of it, of course! This wasn't my favorite chapter, and some of the phrasing and grammar was pretty crappy, but hey, that's what school is for. My English teacher this year is actually going to teach us stuff, unlike last year, so I hope to improve my writing! Leave your reviews, constructive criticism, and ideas for future pairings by clicking the link below! My goal is 5 reviews per chapter, but if I don't know biggie. Next chapter will be up sometime this year! :)**

** P.S: Why do I always post this late at night? The world may never know..**


	4. Chapter 4

***Insert snappy beginning* My brain is too fried to think of anything. Sorry for not updating in like a month…*insert some school excuse* Yeah, fanfiction escaped my mind for a while. But I'm back, and I read The Lost Hero! I won't ruin it for others, but I think it's a lot more epic and has more action than PJO. It was a little confusing keeping everything straight since there were different point of views, and so many problems. But it was still amazing, and I doubt I'll still be sane before the next book comes out. I was actually thinking of not reading it, since my other story was about the Great Prophecy, and I wanted to keep my story and the real story different and not be influenced by it, but my willpower crumbled the second I saw it on my doorstep. (By the way, we ended up having the same friggin enemy. When I read it, I screamed, partly because I got it right, and partly because now my story ends up being more unoriginal than it already was. Thanks, Rick.) Speaking of my other story, if you read the last chapter, it was on hiatus until further notice that was supposed to be at…the end of September. *smiles sheepishly* Okay, no excuse for that one. And since I'm too lazy to fix it, lemme just say it on here: I probably won't be able to do much to it until summer. Stupid, I know. Ah, crap. I totally deviated from the topic. Blame my non-existent ADHD. Let's get back to the story.**

**DISCLAIMER:****I do not own anything, because I don't have an allowance. Even if I did, my parents wouldn't let me buy anything 'useless', like fiction books, toys, or HAPPINESS. I'd probably end up spending it on SAT books or something else that will 'help your college application' so I can get into an Ivy League college and 'get a well-paying job' and 'support us parents who have done so much for you, like feed you and put a roof over your head, when we could have let you out in the street, but we didn't, 'cause we're such amazing parents and you're so lucky to have us.' And something about the starving children in Africa. Ugh, darn ADHD. Now, to the story. Seriously.**

Nico/OC-Mary Sue

"_My name is Anaaliana Constance Rivebratonite." Her red-yellow-green-purple eyes stared at me, boring into my soul. She lowered her sword. "Who are you?"_

"_N-Nico di Angelo." Something about her bell-like voice, shiny hair, and beautiful features scared, but intrigued, me. I could tell his girl was smart, dangerous, strong, and…well, perfect._

_She stuck out her hand, shaking me out of my musing. I took it, and I felt this _connection_. A thousands shocks of electricity coursed through my body, as I pulled her closer, and closer, and clo-_

"Not again!" cried the son of Hades, jerking himself away from the girl's puckered lips. "This is the third time this week! How many of you random creepy girls are there?"

The Mary Sue put her perfectly manicured hands on her hips. "I'm not creepy! I'm charming, wonderful, pretty, mysterious, smart, strong…"

She went on and on, listing all of her perfect characteristics. Nico pinched the bridge of his nose. Her "bell-like" voice was giving him a serious migraine. He was sick of all of these girls chasing after him. At first it was flattering and all, but now it was just plain aggravating. While he waited for Anaaliana Constance Rivebratonite to finish, he took out his sword.

"-and I can hold my breath for extensive periods of time, which is how I said this whole list in one-What are you doing?" She found Nico's sword at her throat.

"Listen, Anaali-whatever," he growled. "I'm gonna make this real simple. You have ten seconds. Either you get the Hades out of here, or I'll take you down myself. And your ten seconds started when I said Hades."

Anaali-whatever smirked. "Oh Nico. You can't hurt me, your girlfriend. I can beat anyone, even with my bare hands. 'Best fighter' was on my list, remember?"

Now it was Nico's turn to smirk. "I didn't mean by fighting."

Her red-yellow-(ARGH! You get the point.) eyes shone with fear. Wait, fear? That wasn't one of her qualities! "You wouldn't."

"Watch me." Nico took a big breath, and screamed for all he was worth. "YOU'RE ANNOYING, STUPID, HORRIBLE, AND DEFINITELY **NOT **PERFECT! Oh, and I'm breaking up with you."

The OC was pushed by an invisible force and fell, gracefully, of course, on her perfect butt. Then a tornado started swirling under her, about to pull her into Nico/OC Universe, where all the other Mary Sues 'who were destined to fall in love with a certain son of Hades' were taken and used to manufacture Barbies. "THIS WAS NOT ON THE LIIISSSTTTT-"

The tornado sucked her in, and that was the last anyone heard of Anaaliana Constance Revebratonite.

Well, that is, unless you owned her Barbie.

Nico brushed his hands off, and smiled when a voice from behind made him jump. "Phew, I thought she'd never leave. Nice job. Though I could've done it better."

"Come on!" Nico di Angelo groaned as he faced yet another strangely beautiful girl.

"_My name is Henrietta Gertrude Barnoldi…"_

**And….scene! Haha, poor Nico, bombarded by beautiful girls. How will he ever survive? So… Like it? Hate it? Getting tired of these little one-shots? Don't worry, this story has a point, sort of. After the next chapter or so, I'll move on and getting to the more plotty part. Hee hee. Plotty. R&R!**


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